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I wonder if Lady Gaga reads this blog? It almost looks like she's actually listened to our pleas to stop getting on airplanes dressed like a member of the S&M Gestapo.
Gaga was snapped in what's possibly her version of jogging bottoms and trainers at LAX Airport - a khaki tunic, absolutely no headgear whatsoever and some pvc trousers.
Yep, even when dressing for comfort, Gaga still wears a pair of trousers that will take half a pot of talcum powder to remove. Still, at least it's a step in the right direction...
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While the Maxim Hot 100 party attracted the usual d-list in Hollywood, People En Espanol's 50 Most Beautiful bash drew Eva Longoria to New York.
Wearing a sequined Blue Marine number, the Desperate Housewives showed everyone why she made the magazine's cut - although she didn't look quite so glam when she emerged from a flight in Nice the following day. You can still expect her to be turning heads on the red carpet at Cannes by evening though.
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She may have looked great at the Cannes Film Festival - but then Sharon Stone had to go and spoil it all by opening her mouth.
In case you missed it, Sharon thinks that the earthquake in China may have happened as a result of the country's treatment of Tibet (and her friend the Dalai Lama). "And then this earthquake and all this stuff happened and I thought, 'Is that karma, when you're not nice that the bad things happen to you?'", she mused to reporters in Cannes.
Cue: outrage in China (and the rest of the world), of course, and the boycotting of Sharon's films in the country, as well as the removal of her Christian Dior advertisements there - and an apology to the people of China not only from the famous fashion house, but also now from Sharon herself.
"Due to my inappropriate words and acts during the interview, I feel deeply sorry and sad about hurting Chinese people," says the actress in her statement. "I am willing to take part in the relief work of China's earthquake, and wholly devote myself to helping affected Chinese people."
Looking forward to seeing you knee-deep in the rubble, Sharon.
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Those of you who know about these sorts of things will no doubt know that on Sunday, Lewis Hamilton drove his car much faster than all the other men in cars around a track on a rainy day, and thereby won something called 'the Monaco Grand Prix'.
Those of you who are interested in a different sort of thing - namely, who's going out with who - may be more fascinated to learn that watching Lewis from the stands was his new girlfriend Nicole Scherzinger of Pussycat Dolls fame.
As well as Dannii Minogue - who Lewis had also invited to Monaco... Oh, and the reigning Miss Grenada, Vivian Burkhardt, who he went to the Cannes Film Festival with... But I digress.
"We've been seeing each other on and off for three months," Nicole confirmed on Sunday. "He was amazing today." As, presumably, every day.
So how will this relationship pan out? Will Nicole give Lewis a Pussycat Doll-style makeover? Will Lewis give Nicole driving lessons? I can't wait to find out.
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Although just clarify: a) those two things aren't related; and b) when I say "shock picture" I mean: "a picture of Naomi Campbell looking shocked". Of course.
For here was Naomi at the Dolce & Gabbana party in Cannes last week - you know, the party where Lindsay Lohan wore this, and Kate Hudson did this - looking beautiful, of course, but really rather alarmed by the amorous man she's entangled with.
Maybe she'd just heard that she's facing criminal charges over that British Airways Terminal 5 incident? You know, the one where she was taken off a plane in handcuffs? Just to clarify, again. I mean, it's so easy to get these incidents mixed up, isn't it?
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Here was Kate Hudson - well, the top of Kate Hudson's head, to be precise - as it she flew out of Nice airport yesterday.
Wearing green-rimmed sunglasses, a grey jacket and a little scarf around her neck, Kate didn't look particularly keen on all the attention she was getting. Something tells me that 'dumping Owen Wilson and then dating his friend and seven-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong' might mean she'll have to get used to it, though. Chin up, Kate! Or however you say that in French.
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Doh!
Dannii Minogue flew in for the final few nights of the Cannes Film Festival - and, well, if the nautical thing is back in, there's no better place to wear a Breton top, eh? I mean, apart from in Brittany, obviously.
Dannii was also sporting a Prada handbag (maybe that's where she was keeping her onions?) and a matching pair of metallic boots. Keep your onions eyes peeled to find out what she wears later this week for Kylie's 40th birthday celebrations in Paris... Ooh la la! As they across La Manche.
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Friends, Romans, countrymen: lend me your cameras! For the ever-stylish Dressed-Down Woman Julia Roberts, her husband Danny Moder and their twins Henry and Wotsit have landed in Rome.
And when in Rome... it pays to avoid Diego Maradona. Who's just around the corner in Cannes*.
"I would do anything to see her coming along here, along the Croisette," said the infamous Argentian footballer in Cannes this week (his has a film to promote. No, really).
"I'd like to be able to walk along behind her and I'd be able to cut off my hand for that, even the hand with which I scored against England," he continued. "I'd be able to cut off my hand if I could see Julia Roberts."
So will Julia go to Cannes? Will she walk along the Croisette? Will Diego Maradona cut off his own hand in some dramatic bloodletting moment on the red carpet?
Ooh... I can't wait to find out!
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*note: in American geographical terms, Rome and Cannes are just around the corner from each other.
Well, when I say "in public" I do mean: "at a private party held for A-list celebrities". So A-list, in fact, that even Petra Nemcova was refused entry. Or did I mention that already?
Yes, don't be fooled by Kate Hudson's pretty-in-white look here as she entered the Dolce & Gabbana party at the Cannes Film Festival on Friday night.
Do, however, be fooled by the minx-like look in her eyes.
Because according to witnesses, the former squeeze of Owen Wilson was soon locking lips with new love Lance Armstrong in full view of other A-listers.
"The pair kissed and danced to old Madonna songs and other '80s favorites," reports People - with a source telling the mag: "They were beaming at each other. So cute," while another witness tells OK!: "They swayed with each other and kissed and laughed and held hands."
Aww! I think. Mind you, I also think I'm bored of Kate Hudson and Lance Armstrong already.
Next!
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Does anyone stand like this in real life?
Lindsay Lohan did her mini dress thing at the Cannes Film Festival again last night - at the Dolce & Gabbana party - showing off her perfect pins in a little green beaded dress.
The Dolce & Gabbana party was so A-list, dahling, that even Petra Nemcova couldn't get in. Imagine!
But as for Lindsay, our crying, talking, sleeping, snogging living doll: well, if my feet were at a similarly vertical angle, I think I'd be standing like that, too.
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